Easing into the changing season, maybe carrying some budding hopes. Or not!
Some days, I’m right back into my childhood body, bursting with excitement at the green chill of a morning on the way to school. The light, a blessing, as I skip along, a different route each day, because I wasn’t fond of the monotony. And I always had a feel for adventure.
Other days, I’d drag my feet, trail through the muddy puddles of gathering rain, take the long way around, through the concrete maze of the hospital buildings behind our block of flats because I didn’t feel loved. Or because my dad had pulled my hair too much, too tight into pigtails that just weren’t meant to be.
On those days, it was easy to see how my mood was reflected in the weather. Or how the weather reflected my mood. It’s weird how that happens. Or is it really? If I believe what I preach, that we and Mother Earth are one, then this connection is no surprise but a given.
These days, much older, as we slide into Spring, some days are light bright, while others showers and grey, I feel this shift in energies and clashes of temperatures and light. Each day now sure what it wants to be or bring. I feel within my body that reluctance to be certain. To leave behind the security of winter, that warmth of my cosy duvet, the calm of a flickering candle to bounce into Spring with fresh hopes and dreams, with heart open and ready for what, I know what.
Today though I remember, I need the reminder, that I am nature. And nature is me and energies come and go with the flow. And why fight our nature? Why deny what I can feel within my body. Change. Change is the only constant. And to fight change is to fight nature. Is to fight myself, and I’m far too tired to fight things I can’t change. I’d rather save my energy for the things I can control and have a shot at changing.
Today I might not be bouncing into Spring with lustre but I am lifting my head, tilting my chin towards the light coming through my window along with a breeze. A breeze, I trust in a few more days, and weeks will refresh my spirit to no end.
Here’s wishing you some days of child-like wonder and awe within this still green for now world I’m grateful to be a part of.
Taken from the most recent post for The Earth Sea Love Zine over on Substack. You can subscribe here for free or become a paid subscriber too.